No Words Tonia Brewer

No Words – Looking for my Heartbeat at the End of Pulse

Authors note: The Pulse nightclub massacre here in Orlando on June 12th,  affected many people. Personally, I’m still processing it 2 months later. I’ve had several situations that have shaken me to my core in this life but this – this was unlike anything I’ve experienced. My phone started blowing up around 3:00 a.m. that horrible morning and the sick feeling in my stomach hasn’t completely subsided to this day. It took me several days to write about it. The following is what came out of me when my fingertips finally touched the keyboard. I’ve shared it at various events around town and have had offers to publish it in several publications. But I’m still feeling raw and protective, and not ready to let it leave home just yet. I’m a believer in that something good will always come from something bad. It’s hard to see that when 49 lives have ended and 50 more are forever changed. I think the best way to honor those people is to be the most kind and loving people we can be. And to always remember that love is the answer. Love is love is love is love….

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Michaels Last Love Letter to His Girls

I just finished making a Spotify playlist. Hardly seems blogworthy I know. Except that this particular playlist will be the background as we scatter the ashes of a man taken way too soon. I’ll accompany my best friend and her daughter today to say the final goodbye to their lifelong partner and father respectively. It’s not going to be an easy day. My friend asked me to do a song list with some of Michael’s favorite songs. Since music has always been important to me and I have a rather broad appreciation for all genre’s so I figured I would gather the songs and that would be that. Silly me. Continue reading Michaels Last Love Letter to His Girls

I Now Know Tonia Brewer

This is What – I Now Know…

Rainy days do something to me. Maybe it has to do with being an Aries. The cooling effect of the rain on my fire self puts me in a gentle mood. A thoughtfulness pours over me and I find myself thinking about things from a different perspective. After my meditation this morning I found myself philosophizing the meaning of life. My life specifically. All day thoughts and questions passed across my mind. I decided to take a scientific approach and begin with what I know. What I now know about this life that is mine. And as the rain began to fall, I tried to make some sense of these things in the only way I really know how to. Writing them down. So here, in no particular order is what  I Now Know….  Continue reading This is What – I Now Know…

Life with my Father - As Good As it Gets Tonia Brewer

Life With My Father – As Good As It Gets

Author’s note: At the behest of a good friend, I wrote this piece to read at an event he organized and named; Color Me Father. It’s never easy to bare your soul, especially when it involves someone who has had meaning in your life. Honesty is of the utmost importance to me and I find it difficult to be anything but truthful, especially in my writing. I never intend any malice, nor harbor ill will towards the people in my life who have caused me pain. Seeking to learn the lesson, I desire to become a better person and be true to my life’s motto…. Love is the answer. <3 Continue reading Life With My Father – As Good As It Gets